There is nothing like a "perfect" relationship.No matter how adorable it may look to the public,it does not mean that it is perfect.It can be very depressing and draining to be in a unhealthy relationship.This applies to all kinds of relationships like friendships,family relationship and romantic relationships. There are major elements that should characterize a healthy relationship,read them through and ask yourself wether the relationship you are in is healthy or not.
1. YOU WANT TO BE IN IT
This is most fundamental element.You have to want to be in a relationship with the person in the first place without being forced.It should be out of love,care and concern for them.If you find yourself questioning your willingness to be in a relationship with them,you should probably stop being unfair to yourself and let them be.
2. YOU CAN BE YOURSELF
In a healthy relationship,you must be able to express yourself without being judged.Sometimes its so easy to lose yourself in the process of taking care of other people in your relationships. A person you are in a relationship with should support and encourage you to be yourself and to be a better person.If you are in a relationship where you are constantly made to feel small and unworthy,its time to wake up!!
3.COMMUNICATION
I have seen couples who don't talk in their houses but pretend all is fine when in public. I have seen siblings who stopped talking to each other too! Lack of communication kills relationships.If you can only have a real conversations only under the influence of alcohol or when pressured by a third party ,that relationship is damned.The only saviour in any relationship is COMMUNICATION.If it dies,the relationship dies with it.
4.TRUST
When you trust someone to protect their space in your life at all cost and they do exactly that,that is a healthy relationship.Trust is like a swing where you swing knowing that you won't fall because the swing has been built well and certain measures were taken to make sure no one will ever fall.You have to choose to trust the other person too,give them the benefit of the doubt because we are all human.Don't let paranoia get the better of you.Relationships based on trust last longer than those based on mere affection.
5.PRAYER
Do you pray together?Do you talk about God in your relationship? Do you go to church even once in a while?Do you read the bible?When you involve God in your relationship,God takes the wheel and steers it into the right direction.You don't have to be a devoted christian or a holier than thou.But always remember God,he will give the parties involved strength and wisdom to carry on. Pray for your partner,child or parent even when they are absent.It brings a sense of warmth into your heart and grace into their lives.
No one is perfect,so we must be very good listeners and give our best in order to receive the best.A person does not come into your life to complete you but to compliment you.They don't become your other half but they come as a whole person,and together you walk on this journey called life.
Goodluck! Be at peace,not in pieces.
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